Think like a Genpreneur and use gentle touches…

From appliance repair to soil testing, in the West we hire out everything imaginable. By putting my family first by engaging in authoritative parenting while co-working, enabled me to easily delegate whatever was not part of my purpose, in a strategy born out of being the mother I wanted to have.

Swimming lessons

In early elementary school my mother wanted me to learn how to swim, so she took me to a community pool. The water was beautiful and everyone seemed to be having a ball. I was so excited to be thought of in this way and thrilled to dip my feet in the water. Only events took a very different turn.

Mother had a private conversation with the lifeguard on duty. Afterwards I was instructed to climb to the top of a very tall ladder more than twice his height and he was much taller than me. It could have been a sky scrapper from my child sized view. Raised to obey, I complied but with every rung I climbed the grip of fear choked me tighter and tighter, at the direction of a man I never met before. I tried to push the fear away because she knew I couldn’t swim, she was deathly afraid of heights, and I don’t remember once seeing her take a lap in my life. Still I forced myself to obey them, instead of my spirit that was shouting the opposite. When I finally got to the top I felt like I could see the entire city scape. I had not been that high before, when suddenly without warning that man pushed me off the ladder and I sunk like a log scraping my knees on the cement at the bottom. It wasn’t just fear that took over but a desperate need for survival as I fought my way to the surface with no one to help.

When I finally emerged the safety expert and my mother were laughing as I gasped for breath. I never consciously put it all together until sitting here writing to you, but that memory framed how I would respond when it became my right to choose. My baby. My choice.

When my son was a newborn we rode my bike to swimming lessons, so he wouldn’t develop my fear. He cried between breaths while I studied the instructor like a hawk. Soon he was enjoying himself. She taught her grandchildren shortly after they were born and in no time my baby boy could also swim like a fish.

Then 23-yrs later when his little sister arrived I had relaxed my nerves. We were at the club pool along with another mom and her daughter. I made sure my little girl had a life jacket on. Our children were in the shallow end while we were in the jacuzzi nearby. Suddenly an elderly man came over holding my child who he had just saved from drowning. How did it happen?

Her friend was an excellent swimmer and didn’t know there were people in the world who weren’t. Seeing how cumbersome the vest was she took it off to make it easier for her to swim. Being toddlers neither of them saw anything wrong. After we all got over the shock, Lana told me how she taught her daughter to swim within days. I took severe notes, but I had a hard time believing that I was capable based on my own trauma history. She reassured me no one was more appropriate for her to learn from, because she trusted me. Reluctantly I set out to replicate her results. Even though I was afraid she laughed the whole time enjoying a new game with me. Sure enough, it only took days for her to become comfortable swimming. Today both of my children see the ocean as one of their favorite pastimes.

Bicycle lessons

Similarly learning to ride a bicycle was also traumatic for me. The first time I sat on one I was pushed hard and was instantly out of control, flying down a hill fearing for my life. I blocked the memory of the outcome but was again determined not to repeat that tradition.

My daughter rode a bike for the first time while we were being trafficked. Constantly searching for ways to create memories beyond our circumstance, I found opportunities hidden all around us.

While a family took us in so we could hide from Peter the pedophile I saw an opportunity to give her a new adventure, one that would again be the opposite of mine. In a compound (a sometimes gated community of similar homes) we went outside where she had plenty of room and I told her to sit on the bike and feel what happened when she shifted her weight around. When she was ready I then told her to go forward at her own pace to experience how the bike moved. Then when she was ready, I invited her to lift her feet off the ground and feel the difference, etc. Every step was taken at her own pace.

The encounter felt right to me as a mother and within the hour she was able to navigate without anyone interfering with her own ability to develop a new skill.

This is the way we approached co-working together as Genpreneurs, because God taught me…

I will teach all your children, and they will enjoy great peace.

Isaiah 54:13

We share more stories in the E-Book. Engaging in active parenting shifted atmosphere’s in the corporate world, because we first set the tone at home. So, by the time we got trafficked, we had mastered the artform wherever we could find a place to sleep.

I’m Adelaide. Thanks for joining me.

P.S. Let’s be the media our children learn from. Screen shot success & share #CoWkSavesAChild.

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